The Sylvester Stalloeuvre: Stallolitics

May 21, 2012

“I’m reminded of a recent, very popular movie. And in the spirit of Rambo, let me tell you: we’re gonna win this time.” The year was 1985, the speaker was President Ronald Reagan, the war “we [were] gonna win this time” was the invasion of Cambodia, and the movie was Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985). In 1985, Sylvester Stallone was not simply the biggest movie star in America, (boasting the #2 and #3 box office champions of the year), nor was he simply a symbol of America (as discussed exhaustively here). Long before cinematic catchphrases like “Mission Accomplished!” and “We’re gonna smoke ‘im out of his hole!” were expected – nay, encouraged – from Commanders in Chief, Sylvester Stallone was a small component of American foreign policy!

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To interviewers, Stallone often has rued Reagan’s comment for “politicizing” Rambo, professing shock – shock! – that his movie about a war-scarred Vietnam vet who heads back to ‘Nam to retrieve forgotten POW’s would be perceived as political. Rambo: First Blood Part II as a polemic? Bah! You’d needta be some sorta liberal socialist to see politics in such lines as “Sir, do we get to win this time?”

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“A lot of people say, ‘Oh, why is Rambo so right-wing?’” said Stallone to Sean Hannity in 2008. “First of all, Rambo is kind of politically agnostic […] Rambo lives in a very neutral environment, but the one thing that he does believe in – and I dunno how you believe in this – at this point in his life he believes that war is natural, peace is an accident. You can start a war in literally five seconds; to make peace takes hundreds of years.” Later in the interview, he went on to explain how he hoped that Rambo (2008) would shed light on the Burmese Civil War, and inspire the international community to intervene. So, in other words, Rambo is apolitical, except when he’s political.

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In 2010, during the release of The Expendables, Stallone took an even more disingenuous stance on The O’Reilly Factor. This time, the charges against him were a little more abstract: L.A. Times critic Steven Zeitchik derided the film’s “apple-pie-patriotism” as being symptomatic of a toxic political climate (the helpful caption: “Too Patriotic?”). With tongue firmly in cheek, Bill O’Reilly asked, “Correct me if I’m wrong… this is an action movie, correct? Guys, macho guys like you, killing bad guys. That’s pretty much what it is.” In his best “aw shucks” tone, Stallone agreed. The general tone of the interview skewed heavily towards “There’s no political dimension to The Expendables because there isn’t!” with a side order of “Pauline Kael said Dirty Harry was fascist but it made a lot of money anyway so nyah!” (And, with typical class, O’Reilly felt the need to specify that Kael was “a woman critic”).

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It’s during interviews like these when I find myself liking Stallone the least. If you agree with his politics, then Rambo is a symbol for America’s warrior spirit, and a beacon for our underappreciated servicemen. If you disagree, chill the fuck out, man! It’s just a fun movie where things go boom. Yes, Stallone makes action movies, but he also makes political movies, and it’s time for him to man up and start taking responsibility.

Also out in 1985: Rocky IV, which you’ve already seen a million times on TBS so I don’t really need to summarize. For the sake of form: when Soviet superfighter Ivan Drago (America’s sweetheart, Dolph Lundgren) emerges as the world’s most fearsome boxer, Rocky’s ex-opponent/current-trainer Apollo Creed (the immortal Carl Weathers) decides it’s time to punch his Aryan ass back to Russia. Things go about as you’d expect for a long-retired boxer who couldn’t even beat an unknown Philly longshot: Apollo gets beaten to death in the second round.

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Now, having already validated his existence in the first two films before reclaiming his caged, vaguely tiger-like fury in the third, the only thing left for Rocky to do is 1) avenge Apollo Creed, and 2) end the Cold War, roughly in that order. So Rocky agrees to fight Drago, but victory won’t come easily. While Rocky retreats to a cabin in the Russian wilderness and trains the old-fashioned way, Drago trains in a laboratory, pumped with electricity and performance-enhancing drugs, more machine than man.  Outrage of outrages, Drago has even been taking steroids. Our man Rocky would never stoop to such tactics. He’s an honest fighter. He’d never… oh, I dunno… be arrested at an airport for smuggling 48 vials of banned human growth hormones into Australia, or anything of that nature.

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Rocky IV is obviously a hilarious piece of Cold War ridiculousness, but for all its right-wing excess, I would argue that it has a tiny bit of political nuance. When Apollo challenges Drago to a fight, he barely bothers to train, assuming the Russian will be easily defeated by his inherently superior American fighting technique. When the match rolls around, Apollo enters the ring in full Uncle Sam uniform, joined this time by a lavish production number featuring James Brown singing “Living in America.” That Apollo’s cockiness leads to his bloody death teaches Rocky/America a valuable lesson: there is no such thing as manifest destiny. If Rocky/America is to stand up to the challenge of Drago/Communism (or for that matter, fascism, terrorism, and any other theoretically un-American concept), he/it will to shed itself of his/its American entitlement. He/it will need to work hard – so hard that even the underhanded tactics of Drago/(insert enemy here) will crumble under his/its weight.

Although the movie does end with an entire stadium full of Russkies chanting “Rocky! Rocky!” before our hero literally drapes himself in the American flag. So, y’know, Stallone isn’t Gore Vidal or anything.

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The Samaritan Review

May 18, 2012

Despite a suitably gritty start, the Toronto-set neo-noir The Samaritan quickly gets bogged down in inconsistencies and plot twists cribbed from other better films. Continue reading

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Inside Inside Out

By Dork Shelf
May 18, 2012

Since 1991, Inside Out has been one of the world’s premiere LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans) film festivals. The annual Toronto-based fest kicked off last night, bringing together filmmakers and audiences in a celebration of the best queer film … Continue reading

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Battleship Review

May 17, 2012

BOOM BOOM WUBWUBWUBWUBWUB SMASH WHHHHIIIRRRRR BRRAPP BRRAAAPP BRRAAAAPPP PEW PEW PEW WUBWUBWUB “FFFFIIIIIIRRRRRRREEEEE!!!” WHOOOOOSH BOOMBOOMBOOM Continue reading

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Bernie Review

May 17, 2012

Based on a bizarre true life crime from 1996, director Richard Linklater’s coal black comedy and mockumentary Bernie stands as one of the best films of his already stacked career. Continue reading

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Marley Review

May 17, 2012

A complex, thorough, and painstaking tribute to the legend of reggae icon Bob Marley, director Kevin Macdonald has crafted the documentary experience of the year so far with Marley. Continue reading

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CONTEST: See THE CORRIDOR in Toronto!

By Dork Shelf
May 16, 2012

It’s that time again! We’ve another great contest for our readers in Toronto. Dork Shelf wants to send five lucky winners and their guests to see a screening of the Canadian indie thriller The Corridor in Toronto on Friday, May 18th at 9:00 PM at the Projection Booth Cinema! Continue reading

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Interview: The Samaritan Director David Weaver

May 16, 2012

We talk to The Samaritan director David Weaver about how the noir films of his youth crafted his latest Toronto shot project, working with Samuel L. Jackson, and the fine art of crafting a film about a con. Continue reading

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CONTEST: See MOONRISE KINGDOM in TORONTO!

By Dork Shelf
May 15, 2012

Win one of fifteen double passes to see Moonrise Kingdom in Toronto on Thursday, May 24th at 7:00pm from Dork Shelf and Entertainment One! Continue reading

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The Dictator Review

May 15, 2012

The Dictator is simultaneously tasteless and toothless – a provocation in search of a point, taking a potentially explosive premise and reducing it to the level of a mediocre studio comedy and never living up to any of its transgressive promises. Continue reading

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This Week in DVD: 5/15/12

By Dork Shelf
May 15, 2012

This week’s a busy one at the video store, as we take a look at Chronicle, Hard Core Logo 2, a BBC remounting of Great Expectations, Rampart, Albert Nobbs, the first season of Hell on Wheels, Wrestlemania XXVIII, and a very brief, curt message about The Devil Inside. Continue reading

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Scenes from The Dictator Press Junket

May 14, 2012

We went to the press conference for The Dictator last week, and while star Sacha Baron Cohen put on a great show in character as General Aladeen, where does the character end and the man behind it begin? Continue reading

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